Chelsea’s Diego Costa, Skinny Jeans and I’m A Celebrity

Fantasy Premier League – Gameweek 11 PREVIEW

“skinny jeans, a cardigan and eating quinoa ironically”

By @The_Tom_Holmes (That’s important)

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guest

Not only has my old buddy Craig Hazell run off to the I’m A Celebrity jungle and abandoned our (award nominated) Fantasy Football Podcast ‘The Gaffer Tapes’, but he’s abandoned you guys over here at FantasyYIRMA. Selfish….

 

So, very much like on our (award nominated) Fantasy Football Podcast ‘The Gaffer Tapes’, I’m here to help bail him out and provide the quality that listeners to our (award nominated) Fantasy Football Podcast ‘The Gaffer Tapes’ have grown to expect.

 

To channel the spirit of Craig, I wrote the entire article whilst wearing skinny jeans, a cardigan and eating quinoa ironically.

 

Puddles of Cuddles, Love Tommy T Bag

Defender: Charlie Daniels, Bournemouth

_80002758_charlie_daniels

At home to Sunderland must be the most attractive fixture this season… well, unless Arsenal play Shandong Luneng in some kind of a mid-season tour of the Far East and Olivier Giroud and Graziano Pellè are actually on the pitch at the same time. Phwoarrrrrrrr.

Charlie Daniels is looking at that holy grail of fixtures on Saturday; Sunderland at home, followed by Stoke away next week.

Daniels has been a mainstay in many teams over the last couple of seasons; he’s a defender who likes the odd goal and assist, but at a decent price. He’s played 90 minutes in every Bournemouth game this season and is only £5.0m.

If you wanted to save some additional money; Steve Cook and Adam Smith are both £0.1m cheaper and on almost exactly the same points, but Daniels is a safer bet, and at only 6% picked, you can’t really go wrong.

 

 

Midfielder: İlkay Gündoğan, Manchester City

What he lacks in having a surname that I can pronounce, he more than makes up for in form. Gündoğan is coming off a couple of goals and an assist against West Brom last weekend, as well as an incredibly impressive brace against Barcelona midweek. He’s a ridiculously cheap £5.7m and still only 8.7% picked… and Guardiola LOVES him. It seems crazy that more people haven’t jumped on the bandwagon yet.

In fact, I don’t feel that I need to spend any more time justifying why you should pick him and will, instead, spend the time pondering how to pronounce his surname… Gündoooğan… Gün-doğan… Gündoğaaaan… Güuuundoğan… İlkay. Nailed it. (Ed: You’ve just ruined Street Fighter special moves for me)

 

Forward: Diego Costa, Chelsea

COSTA

Love him or hate him (I hate him), he’s been incredible so far this season (I still hate him). Yes, he looks like a 56-year-old coach driver, but the lad is in form. Chelsea are at home to Everton, which last season wouldn’t have been anything to get excited about, but they seem to have worked out their previous issues and have been impeccable in the league since their loss to Arsenal.

Costa is 39% picked, and if you have Aguero in your side then his £10.4m price-tag may seem a little too steep, but where Aguero has blanked on recent occasions, Costa has remained consistent and, as we mentioned on the podcast this week; you notice when £13.1m Aguero blanks a hell of a lot more than when £10.4m Diego Costa does.

 

Captain: Dimitri Payet, West Ham

payet

It’s true that Payet hasn’t done the incredible things that we all assumed he would after a great 2014/15 season and Euro 2016 in the summer, but he’s starting to rack up the points, and this week the Hammers are at home to Stoke, which seems a tantalising prospect. He has five assists, but just the one goal so far this season. I see it as only a matter of time before the floodgates open and he starts proving why he’s one of the best midfielders around, and Stoke at home this weekend could be just that fixture.

I have a highly controversial secret second Fantasy Premier League team (fake name and everything) in which I go for gut instinct and differential picks. I’ve had Payet since almost the very start of the season and have stuck the captain’s armband on him most weeks, and more often than not; it’s paid off. At £9.4m you could call him pricey, but let’s not forget just who he is. Just think about him. Go on, close your eyes and really think about who he is for a second. Now open your eyes… £9.4m doesn’t seem all that expensive now, does it?

Plus, at a mere 12.1% picked, if you captain him and he runs wild against Stoke, you will be reaping the rewards points wise.

 

Outsider: Ahmed Musa, Leicester

Leicester have struggled a little this season. A lot of people have smugly said that they always knew they would, but then again they’re probably the same people (tw*ts) that said they’d never win it last year. But a win against Palace and a draw against Tottenham were good results, and a very commendable showing in the Champions League means that the Premier League champs are on the up! Musa is only 4.1% picked, but as Leicester’s second choice striker – and a striker that does score when he plays – his £7m price-tag is definitely reasonable. He’s been clocking up some minutes over the last few game-weeks and has scored in Leicester’s last two premier league games. The Foxes have West Brom at home on Sunday and I fancy Musa to make an appearance and probably bag a goal.

You can hold me to that… as long as you don’t hold me too tight, these jeans are incredibly skinny and I’ve eaten far too much quinoa.

author

Former stand-up comedian and now probably former professional compère ? Tom, has hosted nights headlined by notable comedians such as Hal Cruttenden, Richard Herring, Terry Alderton and James Acaster. Tom has compered nights all over the country, including London’s biggest comedy clubs as well as having a Sold-Out hour show at The Leicester Square Theatre before concentrating solely on compering.

 

He co-hosts Award Nominated Podcast ‘The Gaffer Tapes’ with Craig Hazell and Ash Kernsworth. The world’s BIGGEST Fantasy Premier League Podcast with fifteen thousand listeners a week from over 50 countries. Celebrity listeners include ‘Lord of the Rings’ and ‘Lost’ actor Dominic Monaghan (who appeared as a guest) and ‘Murder in Successville’ star Tom Davis.

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Posted on November 4, 2016, in Player Selection and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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