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An apology, by @Mark_Jones86
I’ve let Yirma down.
I know I wasn’t supposed to do it. I know that Yirma legend and Fantasy football God Tom K told me not to do it. I know that, if I could take Saturday afternoon back, I probably wouldn’t do it again.
But part of me is delighted I’ve done it.
It all started, as so many of the most regretful stories do, with Mohamed Diame.
As I watched the West Ham, Senegal and Werder Beertent midfielder roam aimlessly around Swansea City’s Liberty Stadium early on Saturday afternoon, with his team getting ruthlessly hammered by a Swans team with a terrific case of new manager syndrome, a horrible thought crossed my mind.
It was a thought that all of you will have at some point this season, although only the very brave and very stupid of you will act upon it this early.
It was the sight of Diame trudging off the pitch with his team 3-0 down to be replaced by Alou Diarra which finally made it hit home for me. I couldn’t deny it any longer.
My Fantasy football team was rubbish.
I was sure that I had it right at some point during the endless tinkering of the summer, but the collection of 15 players I was staring at now just made no sense whatsoever.
Diame? Darron Gibson? Fabricio Coloccini? Ramires? Ian Harte? It just didn’t look right.
Evidently the big man upstairs (not my large Polish neighbour Jakub) agreed with me, and sent a monsoon to Sunderland to prevent Harte and his special brand of being-useless-from-anything-but-a-dead-ball football from seeing any action at the Stadium of Light on Saturday afternoon. Football was undoubtedly the winner.
There was, however, one man who I thought could save me from this mess.
One man who, like the warrior he is, would lead my rag-tag bunch of wounded, rotated misfits to success, glory and somewhere in the region of a 40 point Gameweek.
It wasn’t Jakub or the other fella, but it was instead another big man who was sure to rise to the occasion and perform on his long-awaited return to his home turf.
Introducing an icon. The one and only. The captain of Manchester United and, for this week only of Werder Beertent. The great Nemanja Vid… oh, Fulham have scored haven’t they?
Bang goes the clean sheet then, but that’s alright. There’s still time for the big Serbian to get on the scoresheet… Perhaps from a cross or a mix-up with the goalkeeper…
My job involves keeping track of football results, so there was literally no escape from the moment when – in the 64th minute of the match against Fulham at Old Trafford – Nemanja Vidic decided to make up my mind for me by hopelessly flicking the ball into his own goal and putting himself in minus points territory.
Now I’m no Manchester United fan, and as such there will always be a part of me that cracks a smile whenever they concede a goal between now and their Intergalactic Cup Final defeat to the Saturn Superstars in 2072 (Sir Alex having retired three years earlier), but this time it was different. I had to act.
So I did.
Straight away the heart of my team was ripped out, leaving only three survivors – all of whom will coincidentally go on to be useless in this afternoon’s Liverpool v Manchester City match.
Out they came and in went the new faces. New, glorious faces. Faces that would laugh at the mere mention of Mohamed Diame.
And then it was done. And then I clicked it. And then I clicked the confirmation bit asking me if I was sure I knew that I was being completely mental. I was sure.
Activate Wildcard.
So I’m sorry to Yirma. Sorry Tom K. Sorry to you if you don’t agree with me. But I’m happy.
Rest assured I’ll be occupying my comfortably mediocre mid-table position come May, something that was in serious doubt for a few minutes there on Saturday afternoon.
I like my team now.
Of course Marouane Fellaini will keep scoring goals. Of course Swansea will carry on keeping clean sheets. They’ll probably keep them in every match for the rest of the season, I suspect.
I hope you all enjoyed the two-week headstart you got on me then, because I’m ready to start now, and I’m finally fully confident in all of my 15 players.
At least until that second Wildcard in January anyway.
I wonder how much Diame will be then?
NIFFTY LEAGUE IS BACK!!
Since 2007 more than 800 people have had a go on YIRMA.
The NIFFTY LEAGUE (Northern Ireland Fantasy Football Through Yirma) started in January 2012 as an invitational Head to Head version of the main game.
Reset and raring to go for the new season NIFFTY is back!
Capped this year at 38 people we have a great mixture of Northern Ireland legends, current Internationals, local radio personalities and the 20th most influencial man in Northern Ireland…
We feel the NIFFTY League has an impressive line up!! Keith Gillespie, Warren Feeney, Grant McCann and Michael O’Connor have almost 200 International Caps for Northern Ireland and much is expected of their teams!
Alan Simpson Vs Stephen Clements is the NI radio grudge match – battle of the airwaves!! I imagine a forfeit for the loser of this pairing could be quite entertaining….
With several fantasy football enthusiasts and of course the Fantasy Yirma Admin team of @ryano83 @mark_jones86 and @pedro_lamb this league promises to throw up some good matches and produce some questionable banter on twitter.
Click here for the full round up! https://fantasyyirma.wordpress.com/niffty-league/
*@ryano83
Follow us on @fantasyyirma for #NIFFTY updates
NIFFTY League players:
Fantasy Yirma: Gameweek 2 preview
Gameweek 2 preview: Forwards to earn their Spurs?
Maybe earning his Spurs is a bit less important to Emmanuel Adebayor than earning AT Spurs, but after completing his move to White Hart Lane from Manchester City at least he’s added another quality striking option for Fantasy managers.
The Togoloese forward (£9.5m) is likely to go straight into the squad for Saturday’s clash at home to West Brom after eventually turning his loan switch into a permanent one, with ‘Ade’ adding much needed strength in depth to Andre Villas-Boas’s striking department after the Portuguese was left with just Jermain Defoe (£7.5m) as a solitary senior forward for last weekend’s loss at Newcastle.
Defoe scored there of course, and he’ll be looking to take that form into the meeting with the Baggies, where he could still start despite the arrival of his new/old team-mate.
The England man continues to be linked with moves away, but it is unlikely that you’ll see Defoe depart North London at least until Villas-Boas is able to bring in yet another forward, and even then all talk of a transfer seems premature.
Now nearly 30, Defoe has seemingly spent a career on the fringes despite consistently finding the net.
There always seems to have been the feeling that managers can do better than him – either at club or international level – but with Adebayor likely to take a while to settle in after having no pre-season to speak of, Spurs are sure to have to turn to him over the coming weeks. Their next four matches see them face West Brom (h), Norwich (h), Reading (a) and QPR (h). The potential for goals is there for all to see.
That should draw you towards Tottenham’s forwards – perhaps with your Sergio Aguero money – and also to the men playing behind them. If Villas-Boas is to persevere with just the one attacker, then Gareth Bale (£9.5m), Gylfi Sigurdsson (£9.0m) and Rafael van der Vaart (£9.0m) will all be looking to get into scoring and assisting positions behind him.
Elsewhere this Fantasy weekend, the lack of a double Gameweek, the advice to avoid Chelsea players who’ll be inactive next weekend and some very intriguing fixtures make it somewhat of a tough one to predict.
After losing so heavily at West Brom, it would be just like Liverpool to bounce back and get a positive result against Manchester City, but it would take the most confident of Fantasy bosses to turn to the likes of the £9.5m pairing of Steven Gerrard and Luis Suarez against the champions, despite City’s concession of goals against Southampton and the Liverpool pair’s rest from the trip to Hearts in midweek.
City will miss Aguero of course and so a stalemate could ensue, which is probably what Arsenal would settle for from their tough trip to Stoke where Gunners forwards should probably be avoided.
Manchester United will be determined to bounce back from their loss to Everton on Monday, and with many put off by Robin van Persie’s price tag (£13.0m) it could well be the other home debutant Shinji Kagawa (£8.5m) who impresses against Fulham at Old Trafford, where it goes without saying that the Whites’ players who impressed on the opening day against Norwich – Mladen Petric (£6.0m), Damien Duff (£6.0m) and Alex Kacaniklic (£4.5m) – will find it tougher to shine again.
Other opening day stars Michu (bumped up to £6.7m) and Marouane Fellaini (£6.5m) could have it a little easier at home to West Ham and away to Aston Villa respectively, whilst in the battle of the two teams beaten 5-0 last week, it could pay to focus on QPR’s players ahead of those from Norwich.
Junior Hoilett (£6.5m) – a scorer home and away against Norwich for Blackburn last season – might well shine the brightest.
Bouncing back?
Don’t forget…
To join the free Fantasy Yirma mini league on the official premier league game follow this link. Remember Free to Play … £50 to the winner!! What’s to lose?? http://fantasy.premierleague.com/my-leagues/15005/join/?autojoin-code=44397-15005
Injuries, terrible form and appointments with Argentinean golf courses were all reasons why these five didn’t shine in Yirma in 2011/12, but could things be different this time around?
Fernando Torres, Chelsea, Forward – Fantasy Price Tag £10.0m
Just the FA Cup, Champions League, European Championships and Euro Golden Boot award made last term an unforgettable season to forget for Torres, who still comes across as one of the bigger enigmas in the division.
Bit part roles in all of those successes will have created a hunger though, and a desire to prove that the £50m Chelsea invested in him a year-and-a-half ago could still prove to be money well spent. There is a sense that if it’s ever going to happen, it’ll have to happen now.
Last season he scored exactly a quarter of the goals and picked up over 100 less Fantasy points than he managed in his electric debut season at Liverpool in 2007/08, and whilst he is unlikely to hit those heights again he might at least find himself approaching them.
The departure of Didier Drogba and the decision to loan Romelu Lukaku to West Brom has seen Roberto di Matteo place a huge vote of confidence in Torres, and with Chelsea recruiting creative players from all over the world to help him out this summer he won’t exactly be short of goalscoring chances.
He’s likely to take more than a few of them too.
Stewart Downing, Liverpool, Midfielder – Fantasy Price Tag £6.5m
By now everyone knows the stats, so much so that it doesn’t even matter that they weren’t true.
As endless tweets, Facebook jokes and message board posts will tell you, Downing’s first season as Liverpool’s £20m winger produced zero goals and zero assists – even though the Fantasy stats point out that he set up two goals in a match at QPR, whilst he managed a couple of strikes during the Reds’ run to the finals of both domestic cup competitions.
Regardless of that, his performances were still nowhere near what Liverpool supporters demanded, and the England man will know that he’ll have to step up his displays if his future at the club is to last much longer. Fortunately for him, he might just have the chance to.
With Brendan Rodgers ready to switch Liverpool’s approach to a 4-3-3 formation, Downing would appear set to occupy the wide right position in the front trio alongside Luis Suárez and Fabio Borini, at least until the Reds dip back into the transfer market – although the emergence of youngster Raheem Sterling (£4.5m) is worth keeping an eye on.
It was from a similar position that Downing bagged 163 Fantasy points in his final season at Aston Villa, more than double he got at Liverpool last season and including seven goals and nine assists for those who like to keep a track of such things.
He might not manage the same tally again, but an improvement looks almost certain.
He could scarcely have got any worse.
Carlos Tevez, Manchester City, Forward – Fantasy Price Tag £9.0m
He’s back – for now – and he looks ready to make up for lost time.
Manchester City fans may have forgotten all about Tevez’s indiscretions last season the moment he started banging the goals in, and Fantasy bosses might be ready to do just the same.
The forward’s fine goal in the Community Shield on Sunday could have been taken from the impressive back catalogue he built up in scoring first 210 and then 185 Fantasy points in each of his first two seasons at City, and now seemingly back on board and back in Roberto Mancini’s plans, it might not be the last such wonderful strike.
The prospect of building a partnership with Sergio Agüero should have City fans drooling and opposition defenders dreading, and if Tevez quickly settles down and – more importantly – is kept happy, then his £9.0m Fantasy price tag could suddenly start looking incredibly cheap.
Nemanja Vidic, Manchester United, Defender – Fantasy Price Tag £7.0m
Would Manchester United have won the league last season if Vidic had been around all campaign?
It’s impossible to predict of course, but the presence of a player who scored well over 100 points in four out of his five other seasons in Fantasy Premier League, and 94 in the other one, certainly would have aided a United side who chopped and changed things at the back after the Serb picked up the knee injury in November which ruled him out of the rest of the campaign.
Now fit, the club captain will slot straight back into Sir Alex Ferguson’s side as if he has never been away, and his club are likely to benefit from both his defensive organisational abilities and his goalscoring threat in the opposition penalty area.
A real leader, Vidic’s return isn’t just a welcome one for United fans but also for Fantasy bosses who were frequently left scratching their heads at just which players would line-up for Ferguson’s side last season.
When fit Vidic walks in to United’s team, and could well walk into yours too.
Lucas, Liverpool, Midfielder – Fantasy Price Tag £5.0m
Like Vidic at United, Lucas’s absence from over half of Liverpool’s season can’t be underestimated, but was certainly vital.
The Brazilian isn’t the kind of player who’ll win man of the match awards every week or even get you a lot of Fantasy points, but it was clear to see how Liverpool struggled as soon as he picked up the problem in November which ruled him out of the rest of the campaign, with youthful, often raw players pressed into service in his absence.
Now back and taking his place in the centre of a Liverpool team who are likely to dominate possession in the vast majority of their games, Lucas will be looking to get back to the form which has made him one of the top defensive midfielders in world football, and he could well be regarded as an excellent cheap option for your team at just £5.0m.
Consistency is key for the Brazilian, and if you’re prepared to play a squad game then his valuable input and steady accumulation of points could be just what you need.
*M
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