Arsenal, Everton and Liverpool Make the Preview

Fantasy Football – Gameweek 5 Preview – Written by @NiallHawthorne

It’s almost a blessed relief to have the insanity of the Premier League back in our lives this weekend, to distract from the farcical scenes we’ve witnessed while it’s been away. The British PM has lost more votes than the Monster Raving Looney Party, John Bercow has become a global celebrity and sex-symbol (according to hordes of my female Twitter followers), England and Kosovo played out an 8-goal thriller in Southampton, Harry Maguire showed that £80,000,000 gets you sod all these days, and Ireland showed that they’re early favourites for the 2030 world cup where Troy Parrott will win the Golden Boot.

Frankly I’m going to be relieved when we all lose our collective sh*t at 4.30pm this Saturday when Pep reveals his first ‘post-international-break’ XI sans Sterling and/or De Bruyne and/or Aguero. At least THAT’S normal.


Defender: Trent Alexander-Arnold, Liverpool    

I’m going to level with you here, right. I’m not particularly confident that ANY team will keep a clean sheet this weekend.

City face Norwich without Laporte and could be spooked by Pukki. Chelsea, Spurs and Arsenal don’t really know how to defend this season, and everybody else seems to have goals in ‘em. Therefore, we need to look at defenders who can contribute going forward, and this leads me to TAA. He’s now assisted in something like 183 consecutive home games for Liverpool and should get plenty of opportunity to bomb down the right wing once more against Newcastle in the opening PL fixture of the weekend.

Plus, he might, just might, get a clean sheet too.

Midfielder: Richarlison, Everton  

When I saw that Bournemouth were hosting Everton this weekend I thought that this game had produced some goals in recent years, so I went stat-digging. What I found was startling and hilarious. ED: I’m astounded you’ve dared to back anything up by stats?! You’ll be banging on about xG next.

8 PL fixtures between these two teams has produced 31 (THIRTY-ONE) goals. Yes, I do believe that the vidiprinter effect is justified (ask yer da or YIRMA, he’s old enough). Ties between these two produces almost four goals a game, and when you peruse their defensive v attacking strengths and weaknesses this season, I reckon that the trend will continue.

Richarlison has struck some form with two in his last outing for Everton following on from a goal in the Carbaco Cabaro Caoabro League Cup, so if the goals flow, expect him to be front and centre.


Forward: Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, Arsenal    

As Hugh Laurie returns to the Watford dugout, he’s got a real mystery to solve that even another of his ‘characters’, Dr. House, would have struggled with: How to get this Watford squad performing. On paper they should have more than enough talent to be mid-table or even above, but their form over the last 30+ PL games has been relegation form.

The reintroduction of a past manager always creates an interesting dynamic. There must have been players happy to see him go at the time, and some may not have been shy in telling him just that. A few barbs may have been thrown into the club WhatsApp group before the gaffer himself had remembered to remove himself. Rumours that Andre Gray took a dump on his desk can be neither confirmed nor denied.

In any case Watford have conceded three goals in both of their home fixtures so far, and it’s hard to see how Hugh Laurie, sorry, Quique Sanchez Flores will have had time to rectify their defensive issues during an international break with so many players away.

Therefore, to summarise, Aubameyang is going to sting the hornets this Sunday.


Captain: Kevin De Bruyne, Manchester City

Eeny, Meeny, Miny, Moe,

Can I tip Sterling twice in a row?

Last time he blanked and let me down,

Salah’s at home with Newcastle in town,

Then there’s De Bruyne at Carrow Road,

I’m tipping him to haul a load,

Don’t forget Aguero when your team you do set,

But don’t blame me after Pep plays roulette!

Outsider: Ryan Fredericks, West Ham United    

Owned by 0.4%, and has started (and finished) each PL match for West Ham this season. He does like to get forward, and has just notched his first clean sheet of the season.


Draft: Dan Burn, Brighton & Hove Albion   

Draft favourite Shane Duffy was dropped last time out to break up the Duffy/Dunk dynamic duo.

That’s gotta burn! Yep, Dan Burn looks like the new incumbent stopper at the heart of the Seagulls defence. He faces Burnley next. Burn v Burnley. It’s gonna be hot, hot, hot!!!!


Fantasy Football – Gameweek 5 Preview – Written by @NiallHawthorne

Written by Niall Hawthorne.

Drop Niall a follow on twitter. Good thing about Twitter – you can always unfollow again later!

Niall Hawthorne has a strange view on most things.

Check out his blog for proof


Posted on 13 Sep 2019, in Player Selection and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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