Fantasy Football – Gameweek 12 Preview – Written by @NiallHawthorne Sing along together! “3, 6, 9, the margins are fine Pep feeling the pressure and starting to whine Tension stoked, who’s gonna choke And they all meet at Anfield to see who’s the GOAT” Ed: No idea what tune I’m supposed to be […]
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Arsenal’s Unai Emery – You’re Fired…and 9 others Get the Chop!
Nov 6
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GW #11: FPL x Apprentice The best show on TV is currently airing, don’t @me any other shows. The Apprentice is the best show. So special that everyone involved ultimately loses, almost always catastrophically. Leaving their “normal” jobs to pretend to do business and then when they lose they must pop on a big […]
Fantasy Football – Gameweek 11 Preview –
Written by @NiallHawthorne
Many of you now have big decisions to make. Those you have previously chosen have left you down, and not delivered what you wanted. But as ever there’s a chance to change your mind and get it right this time. Who’s going to deliver what you need? Who’s going to make your life better? Who’s going to (finally) deliver on all that promise?
Yep, just as each FPL decision is important, the upcoming General Election in Britain is a once in a lifetime event in terms of importance and significance, and you have a chance to choose your future.
But let’s be honest, your choices for GW11 are significant too, so let’s go!
Defender: Marcos Alonso, Chelsea
Considering the fact that Alonso missed the first 4 GW’s of the season, his points haul of 36 points in 6 weeks is bloody impressive and too good to ignore.
This week Chelsea are away to Watford who are the lowest scorers in the league this season with a sensationally crap five goals in ten matches. Chelsea and Alonso have three clean sheets in his six appearances, and are aiming for a hat-trick of consecutive clean sheets. Throw in his attacking ambition and this really seems to be a no-brainer this week.
Midfielder: Youri Tielemans, Leicester City
Last season’s post-January break out star started a bit slowly this season, but just like his team, is now flying high. He has twenty points from his last two outings which have yielded two goals, an assist and two bonus points.
The humiliation that the Foxes inflicted on the Saints should ensure none of them get past the Pearly Gates when the time comes, but that’s a while away, so I suspect that they’ll continue to plunder points and make life hell for opponents. This weekend they visit Crystal Palace, and I’m tipping Tielemans to continue his scorching form.
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Forward: Marcus Rashford, Manchester United
Trying to analyse this Manchester United team is like trying to analyse Brexit. Nobody really knows what’s going on, what’s going to happen, and any predictions will make you look like a bloody fool.
Hi everybody! I’m a bloody fool!
The return of Anthony Martial will free up Marcus Rashford to return to his far more effective wide forward role (probably), and United really battered Norwich City last weekend. The two missed penalties spared the Canaries’ blushes, but it did show that United may be finding form going forward.
A trip to Dean’s Court this weekend offers further attacking opportunity. While Bournemouth are off the back of a couple of clean sheets, they’ve been against Norwich and Watford. Boasting about that would be akin to me boasting about my ability to put on my pants every morning. People are grateful, but it’s really nothing more than society expects. The Cherries won’t be keeping a clean sheet this weekend, you can take the word of a bloody fool on that.
Captain: Any Manchester City Attacking Player You Trust Pep To Pick, Manchester City
What’s the one thing you don’t want to have to face after you concede 9 (NINE) goals at home in a league game? That’s right, a trip to the highest scorers in the league. Unfortunately for Southampton, it’s even worse, and they face TWO trips to the highest scorers in the league. Football, eh?
This is the biggest no-brainer of the season allied with the trickiest selection dilemma since Love Island finished.
You know City are going to batter Southampton. But who will do the damage? Will Aguero start? If you know he will, it’s Triple Captain territory. But he started midweek (scoring twice) and hasn’t started in the league since 1976 or so it seems. Raheem will fill his boots, yeah? But Pep knows his side will stroll it, so will he rest him? Kevin De Bruyne then! Probably….But if at the end of the match this weekend, it wouldn’t at all surprise me to see Mahrez with 25 points, and all of the above with 1 point each after 90 second cameos off the bench.
But you should captain one of them!
Good luck….
Outsider: Kieran Tierney, Arsenal
He’s now started playing league games, and only 1.0% own him. Time to get him in, purely for the attacking potential. Also, Arsenal may stumble upon a clean sheet or two in the next few weeks as they face Southampton, Norwich and Brighton.
Worth a punt?
Draft: Dejan Lovren, Liverpool
A humongous 0.2% of FPL players own him in the classic game, and he seems to be getting the nod over Gomez in the league. If he’s available, get him in. Klopp knows best. So join Mrs. Lovren and Mo Salah and get him in your squad.
Fantasy Football – Gameweek 11 Preview – Written by @NiallHawthorne
Written by Niall Hawthorne.
Drop Niall a follow on twitter. Good thing about Twitter – you can always unfollow again later!
Niall Hawthorne has a strange view on most things.
Check out his blog for proof rantsofarebel.wordpress.com.
Premier League Review: Featuring Tyson Fury, KSI and Timmy Mallet ??
Oct 29
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GW #10: Local Residents x FPL GW10…38 goals in 10 matches, some huge results and of course some absolute spanners got chucked at our FPL teams as per normal this season. Now of course you’re not here to read an actual review of GW10, you’ve had enough of that from the Twitterverse of FPL “experts” […]
Manchester City, Chelsea, Leicester and Zero Brexit Based Rants
Oct 25
Fantasy Football – Gameweek 10 Preview – Written by @NiallHawthorne This week we have seen events unfold that have made us all question our own sanity, wonder at the fecklessness and utter squandered waste of time and energy, and ask ourselves will this ever bloody stop? No, this isn’t another Brexit rant. I’m just pointing […]
Fantasy Football, Horror Movies and Halloween Nonsense
Oct 24
This gallery contains 10 photos.
Game Week #9 Review – F Written by Jack A. Goodwin, (Blame him) -Follow on Twitter @JackAGoodwin GW9…If only international performances counted towards our scores hey, imagine that! Well, they don’t and we’re all sat here scratching out little heads once again asking why on earth did we bother. Now seeing as though we’re […]
Liverpool, Bournemouth, Chelsea and Brexit make the Preview
Oct 17
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Fantasy Football – Gameweek 9 Preview – Written by @NiallHawthorne As International Break #2 draws to a close, we look back on what we’ve learned from the most recent Premier League hiatus. Racism is still abhorrently present in society, and unfortunately nearly as widespread as another human scourge, namely ‘whataboutery’. The UK government are ploughing […]
Premier League GW8 Review – Featuring Oasis, Piers Morgan and Coronation Street
Oct 8
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Game Week #8 Review – FPL Celebrity Face-Off Written by Jack A. Goodwin, (Blame him) -Follow on Twitter @JackAGoodwin There’s a bad vibe this gameweek, very much a negative one, only recovered slightly by knowing that the entire FPL “professional community” are just as naff as the rest of us! But I don’t blame them […]
Liverpool, West Ham and Burnley Make the Preview
Oct 3
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Fantasy Football – Gameweek 8 Preview Written by @NiallHawthorne People are at each other’s throats. There’s clear disharmony, bordering on outright mutiny. Former allies are now clear enemies. Promises are not being delivered. The leader is being openly derided and questioned. The future is very uncertain. But that’s enough about the Tottenham dressing room, […]
Street Fighter, Top Gear and a Vague Premier League Gameweek Review
Oct 2
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Fantasy Football Gameweek 7 : FPL Birthday Celebrations Written by Jack A. Goodwin -Follow him on Twitter @JackAGoodwin Ed: We’ve gone past the point where I need a disclaimer…anyway… off you go Jack Some truly magical scenes were witnessed in Manchester city centre this past weekend – with my 32nd birthday celebrations well underway there […]